It's hard to look good when your are ill and suffering. Yet for lupus patients, based on what I have read on the net and experienced so far, it seems one common exclamation from people is "but you don't look sick!" When my insurance agent visited me at the hospital while I was pancytopenia , I remembered one of thing he said was "you still look quite okay". Not sure whether he really meant it or he said that to console me then!
Anyway when you are sick with low energy, many of us don't really care much about our appearance. I was one of them. My hair was thinning and messy, I dressed sloppily and I felt lousy. After a few days at home, I decided that enough was enough. I trimmed my hair, resumed my skincare routine and took effort to choose my clothing when I visited the doc. While I don't look 'fabulous", I look neat and I feel good.
Guess when you feel good, self-worth and self-esteem increase and so is the energy level (of course with the help of medications!). I am now able to do some housework and other stuff without the sense of uselessness or helplessness.