Having been through several episodes of sufferings and experienced the death of a close relative due to cancer in the last few years, I have learned to cherish life more. I faithfully go for regular checkup (from monthly to every 3 months and now every 4 months) with my lupus doc, testing my blood and major organs like kidney function every time. I also go for annual eye checkup since the medication, Plaquenil that I am taking daily now may have side effects on the eye retina. It is still hard to juggle family life and work life. But I am grateful that I am able to wake up everyday, hug my hubby, fetch girl to school, go to work and have dinner with them in the evening. Life is simple but it is the simplicity that brings joy. I try to be less critical of life and less critical of others. There are still times that I feel depressed and unhappy over things that people said of me or when I feel frustrated when things do not turn out the way it is supposed. But at the end of the day, I try telling myself whether these things that irritate or stress me out now are important when I am at my death bed.
I read an article recently on why Bhutan people are happy. It seems weird and paradoxical but it suggested that it is the thought about death everyday that make them happy. Here are the links if you are interested to read about it, though I must qualified that I am no advocate of any religion or any practice.
I do not know how long I can live or how long I can stay healthy before I succumb to the next flare up or next illness . But as long as I wake up everyday healthily, I am grateful to be alive and living - to love and be loved by the loved ones around me. I wish the same for everyone who are reading this post.